As a black woman who has had to frequently navigate predominately white spaces I am reflecting on the impact of being “othered”. Join me as I candidly speak on the impact of “loud & proud” racism and the closeted “liberal” racist.

The three biggest things I have had to unlearn lately are:

1.) What masculinity looks like and my interpretations of it

2.) The definition of “success”

3.) Exchanging my time and talents for money and corporate validation does not actually make me fulfilled

Dear Raven,

Remember to ask yourself “does this serve who I want to become?”. You don’t have to take the scraps of half hearted affection and try to make magic out of them.

I wish someone would have taught me years ago how to affirm myself and my future, but I am eager to see what the next chapter of my life will look like now that I know how.

See I recite the following affirmations to myself before each day:

No one has it all figured out and the people who look like they do… They just decided to be “In Bloom” for the world to see.

Are you saying that your friend who is posting their business/passion on their IG consistently is doing the most because you secretly wish that you could go after your own dreams?

You see…. what we don’t realize is that our insecurities are usually the loudest things in the room.

What happens when you only know how to survive but the new chapter in your life requires for you to live unapologetically as your truest self? How do you navigate exploring your new season when you feel like you barely made it out of your last one?

You have got to stop living for other people’s approval. Stop running the blueprint of your future by people who have only seen your past.

You feel like life has been beating you down and you get on Instagram to see yet another person buying a home and getting married. You start to feel like if God ran out of blessings He should just tell you that… But are you looking at things the wrong way?

My insecurities sometimes scream louder than all of my positive thoughts. What I feel and what I know are often in a constant battle, so how do I push through?

We broke up for good and he is one of my dearest friends. Why does that have to be a bad thing?

What do you do when love doesn’t look like what everyone else says that it should? Is it even possible to find love in “unconventional” places?

2020 has been trying to drag me through the mud, but I keep thinking things will get better.

Why do women have to put up with EVERYTHING in order to be worthy of a relationship? Why do we constantly have to be blemish free and our partners are “works in progress” well.. I am over it.

Why is it so hard to make friends as an adult? Are our childhood friends the only ones that we can run this marathon we call life with or can we find ways to break out of our comfort zone and make meaningful platonic relationships as adults?

Making one wrong statement about your friend’s significant other can turn into chaos… Maybe you don’t think their partner is good enough for them… Who are you to be the judge of that?

2018, the year that was supposed to make all of my dreams come true left me thinking that dreams were useless…. or are they?

I am so proud to be a black woman, but I would be lying if I said I am not exhausted…

To the men who have helped shape my views on love and adoration, thank you.

Men are expected to do and be so much, what resources are they given to help them succeed? What happens when you are trying to navigate a world you are not used to.